“I Have Very High Self-Awareness” and Other Statements I Flag as a Therapist

The Things We Tell Ourselves—And What They Might Be Hiding

The moment someone tells me, “I have very high self-awareness,” a little alarm bell rings in my therapist brain.

Not because it’s bad to be self-aware, but because declaring it like a badge of honor often means… well, maybe not so much.

It’s like proudly announcing, “I’m extremely humble.” You see the problem.

Sometimes the things people most confidently state about themselves reveal emotional blind spots.

These declarations are less about actual truths and more about survival strategies, beliefs that have helped someone feel in control.

The trouble is, clinging to these statements too tightly can make life feel controlled but also… limiting. Here are a few phrases that give me pause.

1. “I Have Very High Self-Awareness”

Let’s start with this one, because on the surface, it sounds great.

Who doesn’t want to be self-aware?

But people who are deeply attached to seeing themselves as "self-aware" will often struggle to engage in spaces that challenge their view of themselves.

Why? Because finding out something new about themselves would mean admitting they didn’t already know it.

And that feels intolerable.

When we prioritize being self-aware over becoming self-aware, we avoid the very situations that could expand our understanding of ourselves.

It’s safer to stay within the known, within the identity we’ve carefully built, rather than risk discovering something that shakes our certainty.

But real self-awareness isn’t a finished product. It’s the willingness to meet ourselves over and over again—without needing to prove how much we already know.

2. “I Have Infinite Patience”

No, you don’t. Nobody does.

What’s more likely is that you don’t notice when you start losing patience because you’ve convinced yourself that patience is your defining trait.

And here’s what happens when you don’t recognize impatience:

• It sneaks out sideways as passive aggression.

• You become mysteriously drained but don’t know why.

• You’re unfazed by chaos… until you suddenly snap.

• Or you don’t snap at all—you just get stress-related headaches.

  
  

Patience isn’t inherently a virtue.

Sometimes, impatience is the signal that a boundary needs to be set. That something isn’t working.

That it’s time to act instead of endure.

True emotional flexibility means knowing when patience is useful and when it’s keeping you stuck.

3. “I’m Never Angry”

Anger doesn’t disappear just because you refuse to feel it. It finds other ways to manifest: anxiety, resentment, over-apologizing, a tight jaw, that mysterious irritability that comes out of nowhere.

A person who is never angry has simply developed sophisticated ways of ignoring when they are.

If you suffer from anxiety, one thing you can experiment with is paying attention to where you might want to be way angrier than you allow yourself to be.

What do you brush off as “not a big deal”? What do you tolerate that actually makes your stomach tighten? Where does yes come out of your mouth when no is screaming in your chest?

Because anger, at its core, is just a signal. It’s trying to tell you something. And if you won’t listen? It will find another way to get your attention.

4. “There’s No Point in Talking About It”

When someone says, “There’s no point in talking about it,” what they usually mean is:

• I don’t believe things can get better.

• I’m afraid to want something because I might not get it.

• I’ve been disappointed too many times, and I don’t want to hope again.

  
  

This statement often belongs to people who have swallowed too much disappointment, who have tried vulnerability before and felt like it got them nowhere.

So they build a wall around what they really feel and call it “moving on.”

But the truth is, when we say something isn’t worth talking about, it’s often the thing we most need to say.

The thing that, if spoken, might make us break down in a way we don’t feel ready for.

The Red Flags That Catch a Therapist’s Attention

The statements we're most certain about often are where our emotional blind spots love to hide. “I have very high self-awareness.” “I’m never angry.” “I have infinite patience.”

Translation? “I’m desperately clinging to this narrative because the opposite feels terrifying.”

But what if you didn’t have to hold on so tightly? What if therapy wasn’t about proving who you are, but about discovering what else is there?

When You’re Ready—Let’s Talk

If any of these statements resonate with you, it might be one of the clearest signs you would want to consider therapy, a space that will support you in meeting the parts of yourself you’ve been avoiding.

When you’re ready, let’s talk.

Let's chat!

Step into your own story.

• Which belief about yourself do you hold onto the most?

• What would it feel like to loosen your grip on it, even just a little?